Tag Archives: Sex

Contraception : The Copper IUD and Cerelle experience 

This time last year, I was very happy living in my IUD worry free land. I’d just got one put it and thought it was the start of great things. The copper coil was everything I’d hoped for. I’m a nightmare on hormonal medication. I’ve no idea why, I just know that the implant turned me into a suicidal, weepy pyscho; who berated her bf in the streets of Northampton simply because he was breathing. 

So learning about hormone free stuff which such a revelation. I read the reviews and dealt with the insertion procedure like a champ.

I had 9 months of bliss, until an illness and a course of strong painkillers and antibiotics triggered either thrush or BV. It was so bad I felt like I needed to wear scratch mitts to stop me from ripping my insides apart. 5 minutes of ‘relieving’ myself would make me feel like I’d had an altercation with Mr Freddy Kruger. I felt like a wild animal trying to find objects to scratch myself on. Walking, wearing underwear,  going to the toilet and having sex began to get very painful, so after 4 months of suffering, I had it removed. 

My nurse suggested the implant, but I told her it’d make me crazy again. After much deliberation and insisting I know my body can’t deal with the combined pill, she suggested progesterone only. I reluctantly walked away with a 3 month supply and told my bf if you notice ANY differences in me, please, just say. 

One month later and I noticed I was a little bit more teary than usual. I’m emotional as fuck anyway, but I’d be crying at literally anything. On a positive note, I did notice that my thrush had all but disappeared (Bastard coil, I knew that was you!) 

Two months in and I noticed a lot more. I have no idea what my periods are doing. I pretty much ‘spot’ every day, which is annoying.  I’m anxious, moody, very down, emotional, exhausted. I have no desire to leave the house or participate in anything other than being at home. Oh, and my sex drive has completely fucked off. I don’t even want to have sex with myself and that’s saying something! Up until a couple of weeks ago, I didn’t even want to be touched. Now, I don’t know if anyone else has had these specific side effects, but what’s the point? If I’m taking the pill to stop pregnancy and it impacts this greatly on my sex drive, it’s ultimately useless. 

I’ve just started month 3, my final pack and I think that’s the end of my Cerelle relationship. All the sides effects are still there and I’m certain this is heading towards depression. In 3 short months I’ve completely forgotten how to feel or be my normal self. I love my boyfriend and myself far too much to let this pill impact my mental and physical health like this. 

It still puzzles me that women have to put up with this shit. How hard can it really be to make contraception with less or no side effects?! 

The dating game

I don’t know if anyone else does this, or if it’s just me.

If you’ve not had sex in a while and you start dating again, things tend to get a little hot and heavy and you’ve gotta stave things off for a while. Well, I do anyway. It makes me feel a lot better about myself and my general standards if I haven’t slept with a new guy after a handful of dates or the first month (depending upon frequency of dates).

I tend to employ the following tactics to ensure such things don’t happen sooner than necessary:

Not shaving.
I know most men don’t give a stuff, but I don’t feel comfortable sleeping with a guy for the first time if I’m not hair free and smooth.
When you don’t date much, or aren’t a frequenter of one night stands, and especially in the winter, you tend to let the personal grooming slip a little! I’m not saying I completely neglect it, but if I’m the only one that’s seeing me naked on a daily basis for quite some time, I don’t see much need to keep it up! Silky smooth legs, a Hollywood, Brazilian, or a Vajazzle isn’t necessary for double clicking the mouse!!
So no shave = no sex.

Not tidying up.
I live in a shared house, so I literally live in my room. My whole life is pretty much in my room. I can be fairly messy sometimes, with clothes, underwear and cosmetics strewn about the place. However, I don’t want to bring a guy back to mess. I don’t want them seeing how I live haha. Like that episode of friends where Ross dated that really messy girl! That situation is my worst nightmare… Well, one of them! So, by keeping my room messy = no sex.

Big girl pants/matching underwear.
I always want my first time with someone new to be amazing and sexy. For me, underwear plays a big part in that. I’m not much of a matching underwear daily kind of girl. I have similar colours on, but I wouldn’t make the effort to match just for a normal day. When you’re undressing each other, there needs to be pretty underwear waiting to be revealed. I’ve noticed that some men notice and appreciate this. Also, like that scene from Bridget Jones Diary, apple catchers are a huggge passion killer (unless you’re sleeping with Hugh Grant!) Big pants and non matching undies = no sex.

Neutral territory.
I’m not going to have sex in a restaurant, at the cinema, in the bowling alley, ice skating rink or in the park (not without getting arrested). No going to each others houses for the first few dates. This will always lead to everything up to and including sex. Well, it will for me. So neutral territory = no sex.

So those are my 4 rules. 90% of the time, they work very well for me. I know everyone is different and it’s down to the individual when they choose to sleep with a new partner, be it the 1st or 50th date. Just be sure it’s what you want even in the heat of the moment!!